mY naKed Thoughts

Sometimes I wonder if living in solitary existence is an anathema or a bliss. To see just a sole compatriot in this far away Kingdom 3x/ week ( the PT) and virtual meeting of friends is a poignant reality that I am indeed literally alone.

I just recently  pored into books. My nearest newly found companion who always talked to me mutely in myriad languages and yes, the mind-blowing Internet. Yet, before I met ‘them’ I usually just sat alone in endless hours talking to myself, thinking. I just now realised it was meditating. Cleansing my cornea’s tinted mirror and change it with rose-colored perception.

Aloneness ferreted me day by day. But then, I found myself. I guess, I can utter now, I’m good being alone. I remember feeling elated on discovering  things I didn’t know I have and be grateful about. I wrote everything passionately  in my journal regardless of how crooked my grammar is. I felt the burning flame of my words, inked clearly what I felt at the precise moment. I rationalised that pausing is giving my heart a rest. It was effective in combating forlornness and wound up effulgent.

Now, I see the odds and ends of the outside world in books and internet. My hunger to correct the errors of my writings, my dealings with my virtual friends and coping with the fast paced-internet. I am grateful of their presence. I’m happy to be  barraged with mails from friends. Time now flies like a spinning hub of the universe. It’s like breathing. It passes without my knowing. 

However,  there’s something I miss so much. The spending of my time in stillness. It had helped me mirror things visibly as clear as in still waters. With it, I heard the deafening silence. I’m emancipated on my inexorable wall. I can soar high, dive deep. Nothing fetters me.

I miss the solitude of self.

I miss the joy it brings.

Everything has a price. From the air we breath to the water we drink, We paY. There’s no argument on that. That’s why it didn’t come to me as so shocking when I got the Insider News.. 

STUDENT AUCTIONS VIRGINITY SPARKS ONLINE DEBATE.

A student 22 y.o woman, from San Diego, California, who is using the pseudonym Natalie Dylan  is publicly auctioning her virginity to pay for her college education. The online auction site eBay turned her down so the auction will take place at a Nevada brothel, the Moonlite Bunny Ranch, where her sister is working to pay off her college debts. She is hoping the bidding will hit $1M ….

An ordinary issue. The only  extra-ordinary on this is.. It is publicly auctioned. The woman is promoting it so heavily that it stirred moral and  social issues. Infact we have heard about Cherry-popping stories  long time ago, some kind of prostitution but no single soul reacted on it because it was  practiced discretely.

I wonder, Will there be a man willing to pay $1M for a virginity?  If i am a bidder, One thing I would look to the “stuff” i’m gonna buy is the quality. If the capital goods is the “Virginity”  then I want to know how the seller defines virginity? 

Does she define it as never had a sexual intercourse? But what about if there’s an absence of intercourse, no penetration indeed but had engaged in sexual malicious act like oral sex?

Does she define it as having an intact hymen? but not all girls are born with hymens.  How would I know if this woman had undergone  Hymenorrhaphy or hymen reconstruction surgery? 

Does she think when a vagina not penetrated sexually is considered a virgin? But what about anal Sex? Will she count that as still a virgin?

Furthermore,  Is sexual innocence a state of virginity? then I’d say being chaste is a virgin also . Chastity views sexual integrity in terms of faithfulness to a spouse rather than as absolute inexperience. Does the buyer prefers internal virgin rather than a technical virgin?

Natalie Dylan maybe thought that rather than spoiling her virginity at the back of the car with just some kind of a moron, broke BF, She might as well hit 2 birds in one stone. Earn and enjoy.

I look at this auction thing as totally absurd!  We can all be a capitalist using our skills and capabilities with our hands and head. How will you expect to have an educated, cultured self when from the start you never did use your functional ability to have your education? Why doesn’t she just value her virginity not with a staggering amount of $1M but with a self-respect and sensibility? I’m sure she’ll still hit it big time with a good husband who will not just support her studies, pays off her virginity but gives her dignity and treat her as person as well and not just a consumer goods.

Gosh! who believes being rational can give proper answers to  all things?  Please raise my hand again.!!

Life is crazy..huh!