Reflections…
Amid sandstorm I went to my fave loft, rooftop. I was disturbed and sickened with what my Physiotherapist friend has told me a while ago. I need my serenity time to think. I used to envy her. She earns almost six times bigger than my numbers. Imagine? huh! that’s enough to feed a whole lazy community!
I feel every fiber of her being is screaming, with teeth-gritting anger she said she wants to end her life. She was hurt and beaten by people she treasured. The deliberate lies made to her by her precious daughter is withering her strength. She felt betrayed. The emotional blackmail made by her husband is eating her soul leaving her paralyzed with guilt. She had worked hard for two decades in the Kingdom. Physiotherapists here need to almost carry their heavy weight arab patients. She endured it all for her family to savor the luxuries of life has offered which boils to one- Money. Which in a sudden vagaries of life’s tides now becomes invaluable to her. Everything drained like dirt in a toilet bowl.
Is life really a bitch, and we’ll all just die? die in sadness, in desparation or we’ll just literally swallow bullet so when we woke up, things will end up like we designed in our fantasies?
When I was still young and stupidity was still one of my virtue. I thought too that slashing my wrist will change everything. Indeed I was right. It awakened me on my deep slumber and made me acknowledge the reality that the label of a loser was really suited to me and that I needed change. However one thing good though that i learned during that tumultuous moment was, pain that won’t kill you will make you stronger. Pain is a great motivator of change. I recall, whenever I was hurt I wrote it on my journal. All the atrocious words and abusive conducts were written in detailed with the purpose of refreshing it vividly on my mind so as not to be forgetten when “fooling” moment comes.
Life rewards action as the old adage says. With all the insanity I had, no wonder I settled too cheaply now. But we should be aware also that not everything that we did right is the right thing to do because sometimes it just doesn’t work. Bad things can happen to good people too because they allowed it to happen.
Yesterday I sent my friend a message. Hoping it will help her so she won’t end up like journalist Ted Failon’s wife.
Facing it, always facing it,
that’s the way to get through.
face it.
-Joseph Conrad.
